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2. Prescription Glasses. Officer stops a man for speeding— notices he's not wearing his required prescription glasses. Officer says, "I have to give you a ticket for not wearing your glasses." Driver says, "Officer, I have contacts." Officer says, "I don't care who you know, you're still getting a ticket. 3.
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The Police Humor topic page offers all manner of cop humor — from funny police videos to weird police news and even police jokes — that we hope will bring a smile to your face and a chuckle to your voice.. Vinnie Montez on the value of comedy for law enforcement officers "If I can help one person, then I have accomplished my mission.
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#1 "A police officer pulled me over and said, "Papers?" I said, "Scissors, I win," and drove off. He must have wanted a rematch because he has been chasing me for 45 minutes." Report 16 points POST No funny geta a life 3 View More Replies. View more comments #2
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Driver: "You're wrong, officer. It's only my hat that makes me look that old.". 2. The perfect crime was committed last night. Someone broke into the police station and stole all the toilets. Police say they have nothing to go on. 3. My wife put on a sexy officer outfit and arrested me on suspicion of being good in bed.
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"Slower than the speed limit? No sir! I was doing exactly 22 miles an hour", the old woman said proudly. The officer, trying not to laugh, explains that 22 is the route number, not the speed limit. A little embarrassed, the woman smiled and thanked the officer for pointing out her error. "Before I go Ma'am, I have to ask, is everyone ok?
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41 Police Jokes So Funny You'll Call For Backup! These police jokes are in danger of being arrested for being too funny! Have a look at these funny police jokes and find your favourite! 🤣. Beano Jokes Team. Last Updated: February 15th 2022. These jokes are so funny it's an emergency!
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1. The perfect crime was committed last night. Someone broke into the police station and stole all the toilets. Police say they have nothing to go on. 2. What do you call a female police officer playing guitar? She-riff. 3. Why did the police officer smell so bad? He was on duty. 4. Officer: "I notice your eyes are bloodshot.
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So to keep spirits up, police have to have a pretty good sense of humor. And if you check out this list filled with police humor compiled by Bored Panda, you will see that they most certainly do. From funny jokes about the donut-based stereotypes to ingeniously creative and funny social media 'warnings,' scroll down below to see the ultimate examples of police jokes.
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Why is a traffic cop the strongest man in the world? Because he can stop a 10-ton truck by holding up his hand! Did you hear about the two peanuts who walked through a bad neighborhood? One was assaulted. What do you call a clairvoyant who escaped from prison? A medium at large. Why did the sheriff lock up her boyfriend?
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April 8, 2023 Tag Vault Cop jokes, also known as police jokes, are a type of humor that typically revolves around the men and women who work in law enforcement. These jokes often play on the stereotypes and characteristics commonly associated with police officers, and are meant to be light-hearted and entertaining.
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Hilarious Cop Jokes: Why did the cop bring a ladder to work? He wanted to go after those high-level crimes. What do you call a detective dog? Sherlock Bones. Why did the cop bring a pencil to the crime scene? To draw his weapon. Why don't police ever tell secrets? Because they're afraid of patrolling rumors.
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The cop says, "You are the lawyer." The lawyer replies, "Exactly, so where's my present?" A sketchy guy just came into my shop and bought six smoke machines, so I called the cops. I think he must be a part of some extreme mist group. There's a mysterious crime spree going on at our local IKEA.
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100 Crime Jokes. By Laughlore Team Updated on August 7, 2023. Crime jokes have a unique way of injecting humor into situations that are typically associated with seriousness and wrongdoing. From clever wordplay to puns involving thieves, detectives, and even inanimate objects, these jokes offer a lighthearted take on the world of crime.
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Pun-tastic Police Swifties. 1. "I'm sorry, sir, we're closed," the police officer said curtly. 2. "I'll need a few minutes to solve this case," said the detective copiously. 3. "I caught the thief red-handed," said the officer brazenly. 4. "I can't wait to lock up this criminal," said the cop convincingly.
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77 Funny Cop Jokes for Endless Laughter By zandy Posted on November 6, 2023 Grab your donuts and coffee, it's time for some hilarious cop jokes! From stereotypical doughnut-loving cops to bumbling rookies, these police-themed jokes will have you laughing harder than a perp in the back of a squad car.